AGASSI ADMITS TO DONNING A SYRUP

Tennis legend Andre Agassi has admitted he wore a blond mullet wig during the 1990s because he didn't want people to know he was going bald.
Scared and desperate, Agassi went to extreme lengths to cover up his balding cranium.

The grand slam winner wore a toupee for much of his early career, successfully deceiving the audience into believing the long, flowing locks were his. Unfortunately for Agassi, he started losing his hair in the late 80's and therefore had to settle for the David Lee Roth from Van Halen wig range, to cover his embarrassment.

Agassi discusses in his upcoming book how distressed he felt to be going bald: "Every morning I would find another piece of my identity on the pillow, in the wash basin, down the plughole."
Similar things are believed to happen to men worldwide when losing precious locks.
Unaware that sometimes these things happen in life, Agassi decided on drastic action due to the fact that he was shitting himself because of what people might think. Up until the late 80's nobody in the world had ever seen a bald man. Let alone a Grand Slam Winning bald as a coot man. So, Agassi decided on wearing a 'Syrup of Fig' in a bid to save face.

"I asked myself: you want to wear a toupee? On the tennis court? I answered myself: what else could I do?" he writes. Not realising that he could of accepted the fact and moved on. (Agassi is seen right, before the 1990 French Final)

The deception came to a head in the 1990 French Open final, when his toupee fell apart the night before the match, forcing him to play with the wig clamped down with hair clips. Literally crapping his pants with fear that the 'syrup' might fall off in front of thousands in the court and millions Worldwide, Agassi moved around the court and played as if someone had shoved a Marrow up his anus.

"During the warm-up before play, I prayed," he wrote. "Not for victory, but that my hairpiece would not fall off."

Agassi would go on to lose the match to Ecuadoran Andres Gomez.

He decided to ditch the toupee and shave his head at the insistence of his then-wife Brooke Shields in the late '90s. The penny dropped when she told him one night whilst smoking a Crack Pipe, that he looked like a Twat.
(Agassi, left, as he is today)